Jesus is for Losers

by Calamateur

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1.
I hope you can hear me Recalling from memory Al that you'd promised I'd be And I can't understand you But I hope I can trust you I need you to follow me home
2.
If I was driven, driven ahead by some noble ideal Who took the wheel? If I was given, given a glimpse of some glorious road When was it sold? So caught up in the chase I keep forgetting my place Just as I am I am stiff-necked and proud Jesus is for losers Why do I still play to the crowd? Just as I am Pass the compass, please Jesus is for losers I'm off about a hundred degrees If I was groping Groping around for some ladder to fame I am ashamed If I was hoping Hoping respect would make a sturdy footstool I am a fool Bone-weary every climb Blindsided every time Just as I am I am needy and dry Jesus is for losers The self-made need not apply Just as I am In a desert crawl Lord, I'm so thirsty Take me to the waterfall And if you're certain Certain your life is some cosmic mistake Why do you shake? And if you're certain Certain that faith is some know-nothing mask Why do you still ask? They don't grade here on the curve We both know what we deserve Just as you are Just a wretch like me Jesus is for losers Grace from the blood of a tree Just as we are At a total loss Jesus is for losers Broken at the foot of the cross Just as I am Pass the compass, please Jesus is for losers I'm off about a hundred degrees Just as I am In a desert crawl Lord, I'm so thirsty Take me to the waterfall
3.
03:23
Jesus I want to go home with you To do all of the good things that you’re wanting me to do Jesus you’re whispering in my ear Every little good thing I’ve been dying to hear Love me Touch me Preach to me Jesus I’m coming too Please me Tease me Jesus I’m just a lonely boy who’s looking for love too Jesus I’ve never felt so good Christ I’m gonna love you like I always thought I should But Jesus you’re talking way too much If you wanna have some fun you’ve got to have a little hush Love me Touch me Heal me Jesus I’m coming too Please me Tease me Jesus I’m just a lonely boy who’s looking for love too Looking for your love too Jesus you’re beginning to get me down Instead of giving me a smile you’ve got me carrying a frown Jesus why don’t you want to get me high I don’t want you listening to anyone else’s cry Love me Touch me Teach me Jesus I’m coming too Please me Tease me Jesus I’m just a lonely boy who’s looking for love too Jesus I’m just a lonely boy who’s looking for love too Jesus the only thing I want is to be alone with you
4.
I don't know how to love him What to do, how to move him I've been changed, yes really changed In these past few days when I see myself I seem like someone else I don't know how to take this I don't see why he moves me He's a man, he's just a man And I've had so many men before In oh so many ways He's just one more Should I bring him down Should I scream and shout Should I speak of love Let my feelings out I never thought I'd come to this What's it all about Don't you think it's rather funny I should be in this position I'm the one who's always been So calm, so cool, no lover's fool Running every show He scares me so Yet, if he said he loved me I'd be lost and I'd be frightened I couldn't cope, just couldn't cope I would turn my head, I would walk away I wouldn't want to know He scares me so I want him so I love him so
5.
I can’t believe that you’re letting us down at the moment we need you the most Don’t your remember your promise you made a commitment not to give up the ghost We gave up our lives and we trusted your words and we followed you everywhere Even when you were ranting and making mistakes we all knew you could make things fair And now you’re talking of leaving and turning your back on the hopes that we had for you And these delusional fools think you’re something you’re not and that they are the chosen few This was your perfect This was your perfect moment This was your perfect This was your perfect moment Now it’s been wasted Now it’s your wasted moment Now it’s your wasted Now it’s your wasted moment And I don’t want you Yeah, I’ll say it before you do You are not the truth This was your perfect This was your perfect moment This was your perfect This was your perfect moment Now it’s been wasted Now it’s your wasted moment Now it’s your wasted Now it’s your wasted moment Now I see where you’re going I see what you’re thinking I’ll help you along the way Because the sooner you’re gone and the quicker it’s over and we can do things our way
6.
Your demands are downright unreasonable I mean you’ve got to be kidding right All this stuff about losing your life you’re insane Get out of my way I’ve seen great occurrences and I’ve seen miracles and I always knew you were more than a friend But now you tell me that it’s all gonna end In three days you’ll be back again Yeah right whatever In the white light unknown I like it in here I don’t want to go home You took us up your favourite hill Confided all and showed us what you’d always promised us Our fathers I said why don’t we just pitch a tent Talk about old times and never return to the world into which we were sent And I’d like to forget In the white light unknown I like it in here I don’t want to go home But beneath the blackened stone It’s cold outside and I don’t want to do this alone How come I say the dumbest things at all the wrong times Should shut my mouth and just enjoy the white light While it lasts A little glimpse of the past And your government to come Yeah seeing what you want being the only thing that’s done In the white light unknown I like it in here I don’t want to go home But beneath the blackened stone It’s cold outside and I don’t want to do this alone In the white light unknown It’s time to take it all back home Cause i don’t think you wanted things this way And I want you back And I want us to want you to stay
7.
04:16
Jesus, help me find my proper place Jesus, help me find my proper place Help me in my weakness 'cause I'm falling out of grace Jesus Jesus
8.
05:04
Well I'd like to hang out But I can tell that you're not a drinking crowd I got places to go, people to see I got a thirst that would make the ocean proud I'm walking in circles in a waiting room For a welcome I don't feel in my soul I watch the time pass, it pours in my glass I drink it down, blood from a stone Hey brother, hey sister Can you see a crack form in the dam For a loser, no one can touch him He's out slipping through Jesus' hands Looking for love in all the wrong places The sidewalks and the sky Looking for something that no one can give me And no one can help me buy Oh brother, oh sister Don't you see a crack form in the dam For a loser, no one can touch him He's out slipping through Jesus' hands I can't forget you I won't forget you
9.
05:19
You've heard this story told before You've heard this story told four times before But here it is again for you It's clear and simple, beautiful and true I have a little girl I love She fell asleep I thought it was more than it was And I'd heard a story about a man I thought if this is true then he is her last chance I put her life in his hands But I didn't know his name I didn't know his name I found him and I grabbed his hand I found him and I hoped he'd understand But just as we were about to go He turned 'cause someone sick had touched his coat And so I stood there waiting patiently While he wasted time talking to this old lady And then walked in a friend of mine he said I'm sorry you might as well leave him behind Not long ago your daughter died But I didn't know his name Still didn't know his name I didn't know his name Or why he followed me home He said she's only sleeping Soon everyone was leaving And then all I heard him say Was talitha k Was talitha K Was talitha K Did I tell you his name Did I tell you his name Do you know his name Or why he came
10.
06:18
Jesus I have taken my cross All to leave and follow thee Jesus I have taken my cross All to leave and follow thee I am destitute, despised, forsaken All to leave and follow thee And follow thee Man may trouble to distress me To drive my heart to the cross Yeah, man may trouble to distress me To drive this heart to the cross I am resolute, reviled, forsaken All to leave and follow thee And follow thee Jesus Jesus Jesus Reborn Reborn Reborn Reborn So perish every fond ambition God and trouble are all I’ve known Yet how rich is my condition God and heaven are all my own God and heaven are all my own
11.
Jesus, Jesus help me I'm alone in this world And a fucked up world it is too Tell me, tell me the story The one about eternity And the way it's all gonna be Wake up, wake up dead man Wake up, wake up dead man Jesus, I'm waiting here boss I know you're looking out for us But maybe your hands aren't free Your father, He made the world in seven He's in charge of heaven Would you put in a word in for me Wake up, wake up dead man Wake up, wake up dead man Listen to your words they'll tell you what to do Listen over the rhythm that's confusing you Listen to the reed in the saxophone Listen over the hum of the radio Listen over sounds of blades in rotation Listen through the traffic and circulation Listen as hope and peace try to rhyme Listen over marching bands playing out their time Wake up, wake up dead man Wake up, wake up dead man Jesus, were you just around the corner Did you think to try and warn her Or are you working on something new If there's an order in all of this disorder Is it like a tape recorder Can we rewind it just once more Wake up, wake up dead man Wake up, wake up dead man Wake up, wake up dead man

about

11-song album of covers and originals, originally released on Autoclave Records in March 2009.

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“The world needs mavericks like Calamateur….this latest offering is typically brimming with invention and considerable skill…it’s utterly engaging and heartfelt… 4/5.” – The List

“It would be too easy, given that Howie has chosen the tunes and arranged them himself, to suggest that his own material is better than that of Bono and American Music Club. But from the blatant pop of ‘Lonely Boy’ which combines gospel and football terrace chant, to the fantastic ‘Talitha K’, Howie himself constantly comes up trumps, putting the covers in the shade. They always say that the devil has the best tunes, but I’m not so sure.” – Is This Music?

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ORIGINAL AUTOCLAVE RECORDS PRESS RELEASE:

Calamateur is singer-songwriter / general-noise-maker Andrew Howie’s recording moniker. Based for the last few years in the Highlands of Scotland, Andrew has been recording and releasing his own music since 2000.

One look at the album’s track-listing and you'd be forgiven (no theological pun intended) for thinking it was simply an album of songs about Jesus (historically not the best career move for a singer, Dylan’s “Saved” and Cash’s “Gospel Road” spring to mind). Listen to the record though, and you’ll find a stunning collection of painfully honest songs exploring abandonment, failure, disillusionment and the need to question our inherited values.

Jesus is for Losers features five original Calamateur compositions – including a depiction of a one night stand with the alleged son of God – juxtaposed with covers of songs by American Music Club, Zwan, U2 and The Velvet Underground. The album has had a slow-trickle release to members of Calamateur’s mailing list over the past few months. The final 3 tracks will be released on the 9th March.

A nine-page digital booklet and full artwork is included.

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REVIEWS:

"The world needs mavericks like Calamateur. Holed up somewhere outside Inverness, Andrew Howie has been making a find blend of folk, rock and electronica for almost a decade, with this latest offering typically brimming with invention and considerable skill. A concept album of sorts featuring covers of songs about Jesus and a handful of original tunes, it’s utterly engaging and heartfelt, from the bluesy stomp of ‘Lonely Boy’ to the heartbreaking cover of ‘I Don’t Know How to Love Him’ from the Jesus Christ Superstar soundtrack. Yes, really. The whole album is available free from www dot jesusisforlosers dot co dot uk, a donation nets you a bonus five-track EP. Do it now." - The List

"To take the time to listen to this album is to take the time to become totally spellbound by it. Where there are albums in your life that you play and listen to without ever really affecting you, this is an album that truly takes over and plays you, with a soulful, intimate sound of longing and despair that many bands of the moment could only aspire to. The singer has a powerful emotive voice that is effecting on both his own compositions and on cover versions from sources as diverse as Andrew Lloyd-Webber, The Velvet Underground, U2 and, on the classic song which gives the album its title, Steve Taylor. With an eclectic mix of deeply relaxing, atmospheric backings and more raucous accompaniments, it is clear that Calamateur, otherwise known as Andrew Howie, is a very special talent and it is little wonder that his music is turning heads in the industry. This is a collection of powerfully honest songs that will compel you to wake up and take stock. Highlight tracks are 'I Can Hear Her Breathing', 'Talitha K', 'Wake Up Dead Man' and the haunting title track." - Cross Rhythms

"So, if Jesus is just a Spanish boy’s name, why have so many dedicated tunes to him – and I’m not just talking the Songs of Praise crew. On this unusual and free-to-download album, Andrew Howie has gathered together versions by some of the more credible Christ songs as well as a few surprises. The good news first – this is no ‘Saved’ (Bob Dylan’s all-time-low) but there have been stabs at putting JC into a rock context – from Broken Family Band’s Jesus Songs, to Hefner’s wee series of ‘Hymns’ to Alcohol and Cigarettes, as well as Breaking God’s Heart. Hell, even Godspell had its moments. Calamateur’s homage isn’t all strictly religion either, more examining human nature and faith – so there are originals such as ‘White Light Unknown’ which deals with suicide, and a punked-up ‘Perfect Moment’. However, it’ll be the covers that are of most interest – even if these two are a match for anything else here. Lloyd Webber’s ‘I Don’t Know How To Love Him’ is well, odd – it’s hard to get round the fact that Howie’s vocals sit where Elaine Paige’s should be, and this takes the communion wafer for most bizarre track here (or indeed, pretty much anywhere). The U2-penned ‘Wake Up Dead Man’ is one of the better ones here, beating Zwan’s ‘Jesus, I’ hands down, while the stripped-back version of the Velvets ‘Jesus’ – not one of the band’s finest moments – doesn’t lend too much to the album apart from a kind of completism and the sense that there’s something here that’s definitely not one from the hymnbook. It would be too easy, given that Howie has chosen the tunes and arranged them himself, to suggest that his own material is better than that of Bono and American Music Club. But from the blatant pop of ‘Lonely Boy’ which combines gospel and football terrace chant, to the fantastic ‘Talitha K’, Howie himself constantly comes up trumps, putting the covers in the shade. They always say that the devil has the best tunes, but I’m not so sure." - Is This Music?

credits

released March 9, 2009

All songs written, performed, engineered, produced and mixed by Andrew Howie except:

2 - written by Steve Taylor
4 - written by Andrew Lloyd Webber & Tim Rice
7 - written by Lou Reed
8 - written by Mark Eitzel
10 - traditional, based on the arrangement by Billy Corgan & Matt Sweeney
11 - written by U2

Keyboards on 1, 2, 5, 9 & 11 by Mark Hilditch. Drums on 5 & 7 and tambourine on 3 by Phil Moir. Violin on 8 by Hannah Clyne. Heartbeat on 11 by Peter Howie, aged minus 2 weeks.

Recorded at Autoclave Noiselab, Beauly.
Mastered by Iain Hutchison at Glo-Worm Studios, Glasgow

Thanks to Steve Lawson for the Roland U-8 and to Mark Jones for the PC. I wouldn’t have been able to make this album without your generosity. Thanks to Mark Hilditch, Phil Moir, Hannah Clyne, Al MacInnes and Iain Hutchison for helping out.

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Andrew Howie Stirling, UK

Andrew Howie (ex-Calamateur) is a Scottish singer-songwriter, multi-instrumentalist, producer & prison/community group music tutor. He combines confessional & empathetic lyricism with acoustic instruments, noisy electronics & ambient textures to create introspective, hook-laden songs about uncertainty, doubt & love. You'll find him either holed up in his home studio or playing in your living room. ... more

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